Cuddles. . .

A continuation of 'The Next Day'

The next day, I thought sweetly of last night standing in the rain with him holding me close. I would close my eyes just to be able to picture it better in my mind. I had told him that I didn't want to kiss him for a while. He replied that he was alright with it. He had never kissed anyone anyways so he didn't know what it was like or what to expect. 

That night Izac came over. It started out with us just talking on the couch. There was never a quite moment with us, there was always something for us to talk about. After a short time I cuddled in closer. And got closer. And closer. Until his arm was around me and I was practically laying on his shoulder. We talked and cuddled on the apartment couch for an hour or two before he had to leave.

This part also comes straight from my journal after he left: Now that I think about it. That probably wasn't such a good idea. He was really nervous and kept making comments that we needed to stay busy. I agreed. 

I wasn't used to such a timid guy. I had been on dates with guys that made moves on the first or second dates (they never lasted long) but nonetheless that is what I was accustomed to. I liked that he was being cautious and timid; to me it said a lot about his character. 

When I woke up the next morning thoughts of the previous night filtered in my head. What had I done? This guy had never so much as held a girl close and I was trying to cuddle with him on the fourth day of knowing him. We had just gone on our first date on FRIDAY! I had probably moved way too fast and scared a great guy away. . . 

Our cuddling episode the night before occupied my thoughts again and again. I really thought I had just ruined my shot with him because of moving too fast. I decided that if he would keep coming around that we weren't just going to cuddle. I decided we were going to do things to keep us busy so that the physical aspect of dating didn't control our relationship. The physical touch had taken over in relationships so many times before. I really wanted this to work for us without the physical being such a demanding factor in why we loved each other. It was my secret hope and dream that he (or someone for that) would love me for who I am and not solely for my lips or my body.   

It was important to me. Had I ruined my chances?



If you like my story, tell your friends to read it: myblondespot.blogspot.com  Remind them of their own beginning and love story :) 

P.S. JESSIKA JENSEN FROM RIGBY, IDAHO (I am from Rigby, Idaho) IS GOING TO THE OLYMPICS IN SNOWBOARDING!

I got this picture from: http://cauldronsandcupcakes.files.wordpress.com/2012/03/journal.jpg